Week Two: Eight Ball, Corner Pockets

Pre-Week: Hardly a splurge of voting--yes, even beard-dom has its fifteen minutes, especially now in Mayfly attention span society--but the strongest of the entries this week came from within my own household. Most people assume I do these things against my wife's wishes--perhaps this speaks to my nature as a person who does things to rile people, antagonize people, or otherwise go against their wishes for me--but I can assure you that Laura is just as much a part of this scheme as I am. Many of the things I have done over the years, especially things involving hair and facial hair, have come after hilarious discussions with her. So, this week's entry comes straight from her cranium to my jawline: Eight Ball (chin circle, or as close as I could get it) and Corner Pockets (jawline beneath ears, semi-triangular in shape.) I give her credit for building from last week's design and having a vision even I did not have.

Now it's your turn: sculpt my face, or at least my facial hair. Use this week as your base and think ahead to a normal week's growth. Next week, you could attain beard infamy! Voting closes on Sunday, September 19th at 4 PM.

Week In Review: For whatever reason, my current crop of students are remarkably observant about all things facial hair. Maybe it is because they are always looking up at it, framing my face, from under my chin, and things of that nature. But now we seem to start each week with an update about their weekends, and their updated musings on my beard.

One girl likes to begin by pointing out the changes since our last (Monday) meeting, though she provides almost daily commentary on the ever-changing status of the beard. I sincerely hope she does not think this will get her in my good graces. This week, I couldn't even get in my usual post-weekend inquiry, "How was everyone's weekend?" Upon inhaling to ask that, as everyone settled into spots near the front of the room, she looked, sighed and said, "...AND you shaved!" in that Michael Buffer style that squared-circle pundits have come to love and lament as a sign of the commercialization of their gym-bound sport.

Luckily, my sport--that of extreme facial hair growth and change--is never out of style because, much like the mullet, it was never really in style. It is all a matter of what you are willing to strap on your chin and jaw and flaunt around town for the week.

Of course, unlike the lone girl who chronicles my beard adventures nearly as well as I do, there are others who have little to no idea it is going on. One boy noticed on Wednesday, as he said, "Hey, that's cool how you have like those little patches on the sides...it's like you have the chin, and then you have the sideburns." Yet another fit well into the "no idea" category, as I scanned the crowd many a day and saw him with BOTH of his nostrils filled with fingers (up to the bridge) simultaneously. Now that is talent to which we can all aspire.